Presence, Security

One Thing That Cannot Be Fixed

December 10, 2022

Dante de la Torre (front left) at my son’s seventh birthday party.

Something I worried about Tuesday:

Why the breaker that runs the power outlets in the bathroom doesn’t seem to be working right. I reset it, and it trips again. So I have had no lighted mirror in the bathroom for a few days now, and had to charge my toothbrush in the kitchen. It is a pain not having my lighted magnifying mirror, and I am afraid the hairs on my chin are growing and I cannot see them to pluck them, that my face is turning furry and all the people with strong eyes are too polite to tell me.

Something I worried about Wednesday:

Why there is an ever-so-slight smell in the backyard that I hope is not emanating from the septic tank. Although I actually do not know for sure where my leach field ends and where my neighbor’s begins. Still, never a good sign to have a poop-iferous odor anywhere in the backyard. Could it mean that it is almost time to have the septic tank pumped again? Or are the blasted poplar tree roots growing down into the tank and blocking the flow of water, so that the shower is in imminent danger of backing up? Also the toilet? And the bathtub? Which would be so fun in these rainy days leading up to Christmas.

Other things I’ve worried about this week: Decorating for Christmas and the fact that I have not. President Biden’s health. Raphael Warnock and the Georgia election. My son’s college application process. His final projects and exams. How my day of substitute teaching would go. Whether my woodpile is getting wet because the tarps keep blowing off. How much it would cost to install central heat and air in this house because all the wood carrying gets a little exhausting.

If I could dissect every one of my thoughts for you, I bet there’d be a different worry for every other heartbeat. Maybe not that bad, but much more than is helpful.

(Because really: is worry ever helpful?)

How many of my worries ever come to pass? Warnock won (thank the Lord). My substitute teaching day was one of the best I’ve had in a long time. My son is making his way just fine through his projects and tests.  And all those alleged worst case scenarios? If the septic tank needed to be pumped. If the wood got wet. If an electrician had to be hired to repair my house’s wiring.  All of those things could be handled. All of those things could be fixed.

But.

There are things that cannot be fixed. Continue Reading…

Daily Grace, Presence

Snow Day Hallelujah

December 3, 2022

 

Just a nice, generic snow picture. Didn’t actually end up snowing at my house the other day at all (though it did at higher elevations). Still, I was grateful for the school snow day.

There is something very beautiful about a snow day, especially if you learn about it right before you have to get ready for a day of substitute teaching.

I always longed for snow days when I was growing up- those days when we would see a few snowflakes and turn the radio to KAHI, the local Auburn station, and wait expectantly to see if there were any school closures (because how else would you know about school closures back in the day? There was no internet, no text messages, no iPhone alerts.) All my schools were at higher elevations than where I lived, so if there were flakes at my house, odds were good that the buses would have to put on chains, and nobody wanted to make our kind bus drivers do that.

The best snow days I remember? High school. Sophomore year. My geometry teacher always gave his classes a spring break “present”: a huge assignment where you had to draw a picture only using geometric principles. It was something like that anyway. This assignment had a reputation; all my older friends had hated it. They warned me about it. “Just wait until you have to do the picture!” they said. I was dreading it.

Except when it got to be the week before spring break for my class? A series of storms rolled in. It snowed up the hill where my school was, so there was no school Monday. Or Tuesday. Or Wednesday. (Can you guess where this is going?) Or Thursday. And miraculously? None on Friday. The teacher hadn’t given us the assignment yet, so there was no way to work on it over spring break.

Hallelujah.

Best break ever.

Best snow days ever.

Had a pretty nice snow day last week, too.

When you are getting ready for a day of substitute teaching, and then you suddenly don’t have to go? You can take off your “trying to look professional so the seventh and eighth graders will respect me” outfit and put on sweats. You can empty your tea out of the to-go cup and put it in your favorite mug. There is even time for a third cup. You can stare out the window and watch the rain fall (because for some reason it is not snowing at your house yet, even though it is up the hill a little further) and not worry about putting on makeup. You can finally cut up that butternut squash and make that soup that you were hoping to make but didn’t have time for yesterday.

The calendar was clear of all other obligations and appointments, because it was a substitute teaching day. Now?  It was a home day. Sure, it’s only a day, but what an unexpected gift. To be home instead of out where the world makes its demands. No need to be responsible and in charge today. No need to keep middle schoolers on task and happy. Just me in my house with my butternut squash, a pumpkin candle, Biscuit, Fat Cat, and a steady, drenching rain.